 His legacy |
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cHRISTMAS POEM
'Twas the night before Christmas and I dreaded the days,
That I knew I was facing - the holiday craze.
The stores were all filled with holiday lights,
In hopes of drawing customers by day and by night.
As others were making their holiday plans,
My heart was breaking - I couldn't understand.
I had lost my dear child a few years before,
And I knew what my holiday had in store.
When out of nowhere, there arose such a sound,
I sprang to my feet and was looking around,
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash
The sight that I saw took my breath away,
And my tears turned to smiles in the light of the day.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a cluster of butterflies fluttering near.
With beauty and grace they performed a dance,
I knew in a moment this wasn't by chance.
The hope that they gave me was a sign from above,
That my child was still near me and that I was loved.
The message they brought was my holiday gift,
And I cried when I saw them in spite of myself.
As I knelt closer to get a better view,
One allowed me to pet it - as if it knew -
That I needed the touch of its fragile wings,
To help me get through the holiday scene.
In the days that followed I carried the thought,
Of the message the butterflies left in my heart -
That no matter what happens or what days lie ahead,
Our children are with us - they're not really dead.
Yes, the message of the butterflies still rings in my ears,
A message of hope - a message so dear.
And I imagined they sang as they flew out of sight,
'To all bereaved parents - We love you tonight!'
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When I'm Gone
"WHEN I'M GONE"
When I come to the end of my journey
And I travel my last weary mile,
Just forget if you can, that I ever frowned
And remember only the smile.
Forget unkind words I have spoken;
Remember some good I have done.
Forget that I ever had heartache
And remember I've had loads of fun.
Forget that I've stumbled and blundered
And sometimes fell by the way.
Remember I have fought some hard battles
And won, ere the close of the day.
Then forget to grieve for my going,
I would not have you sad for a day,
But in summer just gather some flowers
And remember the place where I lay,
And come in the shade of evening
When the sun paints the sky in the west
Stand for a few moments beside me
And remember only my best.
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A Mother's Tribute
Our son, Rodney, became an angel
on February 12th 2004
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I shall never forget that sad evening.
I received a knock on the door.
From the moment I spoke to the police officer,
my life has never been the same at all.
It took me forever to accept what
I knew that I could not believe.
I became a mother going through motions,
but I'll never learn how to grieve.
No one could tell me how to live my life
when my precious son was gone.
I'd never see his smiling face again.
Oh the days are hard & the nights long!
I'd never again hear his beautiful laughter.
Or tell him how much he was loved.
Oh I live without my dear precious son ...
who now lives in the Heaven's above.
Oh every time the door opens or the phone rings,
I pray it's an end to this nightmare!
I just wish that my son could come home ...
Spreading his love & charm everywhere!
Oh yes, he was loved by everyone he knew.
No one was a stranger that he ever met!
He would do about anything to help others.
A face of friendship he'd never forget.
He has a personality to win anyone's heart.
Oh I've heard so many people say.
He touched the lives of those he met in life ...
As he made friends all along the way.
Oh yes he was a special & precious son.
Who touches my heart in his way.
For he knows that
I will never be whole again ...
For a part of me left with him that day!
And as I think of him this moment.
As I do everyday waking day.
I long for that part of me
to hear his voice...
And hug him in a Mom's own way!
God won't you Please, Kiss my Angel Goodnight
This memorial site was created
out of all the Love
I have for my son.
I wanted to do something very special for Rodney;
So, I started making the Memorial site
so that Rodney's memory would live on forever.
A Mother's greatest fear after losing
a child is that others will forget them.
For all who knew Rodney and for those who never got the chance,
Please take a few moments and visit My son,
Rodney Heath
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Life must go On
Life Must Go On
I don't always find living my life so easy.
with our time of being together now gone,
Although it is so hard with you not here,
I do know, that my life must continue on.
I miss all of the things we always shared,
and so many things we had not yet done.
Everything that was special with only you,
which can not be replaced; not by anyone.
I know I have to continue on with my life,
until time comes for me to again join you.
If I were able to hear you speaking to me,
I'm sure, you'd be saying these words too.
Although my sad heart still aches for you,
and my life isn't the same as it was before.
Life is far too precious not to be fully lived,
and I'm blessed, to still have time for more.
So I will always carry your love in my heart,
living my life the best way that I know how.
Remembering this is what you'd want of me,
and I must therefore start to live again, now.
Memories of you will forever be my strength,
and they will live with you inside of my heart.
I will remember everything you mean to me,
instead of living the sadness, of being apart.
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One Lifetime Wish
ONE LIFETIME WISH
IF WE COULD HAVE A LIFETIME WISH
OR A DREAM THAT WOULD COME TRUE
WE’D PRAY TO GOD WITH ALL OUR HEARTS
FOR YESTERDAY AND YOU
BUT A THOUSAND PRAYERS CAN’T BRING YOU BACK,
WE KNOW BECAUSE WE TRIED
AND NEITHER WILL A THOUSAND TEARS
WE KNOW BECAUSE WE CRIED.
YOU LEFT BEHING OUR BROKEN HEARTS
AND PRECIOUS MEMORIES TOO
BUT MEMORIES AREN’T WHAT WE WANT.
WE ONLY WANTED YOU.
SO TO YOUR GRAVE WE HAVE TO GO,
AND PLACE FLOWERS WITH LOVE AND CARE.
BUT NO ONE KNOWS THE HEARTACHE
AS WE TURN AND LEAVE YOU THERE.
THE ONLY THOUGHT THAT MAKES US SMILE
AND WARMS US THROUGH AND THROUGH
IS KNOWING YOU’RE IN A BETTER PLACE
AND ONE DAY WE’LL BE WITH YOU.
WE’LL HEAR YOU LAUGH AND SEE YOU SMILE
THE WAY WE DID BEFORE.
WE’LL HOLD YOUR HAND AND KISS YOUR CHEEK,
THAT’S WHAT WE’RE LIVING FOR.
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He only took my Hand
He Only Took My Hand
 Last night while I was trying to sleep my son's voice I did hear.
I opened my eyes and looked around but he did not appear.
He said, "You've got to listen. You've got to understand;
God didn't take me from you, He only took my hand.
When I cried out in pain that night, the instant that I died,
He reached down and took my hand, and pulled me to his side.
He pulled me up and saved me, from the misery and pain.
My body so badly wounded I could never be the same.
My search is finally over now, I've found happiness within.
All the answers to empty dreams, and all I might have been.
I love you all and miss you so... please don't keep asking why.
My body's gone forever, but my spirit will never die!
So live until we meet again, and please try to understand
God didn't take me from you, He only took my hand.
~Author Unknown
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Poem written by: Pastor Harnum
Dear Barb & Dawson I use my pen to speak to you,to let you know today. We often think about you,and sometimes for you pray. We know that's its not been easy,it's been a difficult year, But we just wanted to express to you that deep inside we care. The questions never go away,and sometimes we all wonder why, And deep down we can't forget,it seems no use to try. The world may not seem to notice what you have been through, But God in heaven knows,and he's there for both of you. The best way, some would say, to get beyond the tears, Is to look to the future, to seize the coming years. Today and tommorow just strive to do your best, And the things that break your heart,try to let them rest. We wish you both sunshine; We pray you'll laugh again.
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Missing You ( from a friend)
Since Heaven has become your home
I sometimes feel I'm all alone,
and although we now are far apart
you hold a special place in my heart.
I never knew how much I'd grieve
when it was time for you to leave,
or just how my heart would ache
from that one fragment you would take.
God lets this tender hole remain
reminding me we'll meet again,
and one day all the pain will cease
when he restores the missing piece.
He'll turn to joy my every tear,
and when I wear your necklace near
it will become my simply way
to treasure our reunion day.
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How do you say Goodbye
How do you say Goodbye to a son, a brother, a uncle, a friend???
You could say that he brought smiles to many
His sense of humor was contagious.He was a down to earth person.Just talking to him for a minute felt like you knew him a life time.
He was compassionate.He was creative.
He had an interesting sense of style.He had a warm and friendly face.
He loved music and travel.He loved his family and friends.
There was so much to Rodney and we were blessed to know him, if only for a short while.
Although his path he chose alone ,we can still remember and cherish the time we traveled by his side.
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"Tears are the proof of Life "
"How long will the pain last?" a broken-hearted mourner asked me. "All the rest of your life." I had to answer truthfully. We never quite forget. No matter how many years pass, we remember. The loss of a loved one is like a major operation; part of us is removed, and we have a scar for the rest of our lives. This does not mean that the pain continues at the same intensity. There is a short while, at first, when we hardly believe it; it is rather like when we cut our hand. We see the blood flowing, but the pain has not set in yet. So when we are bereaved, there is a short while before the pain hits us. But when it does, it is massive in its effect. Grief is shattering.
Then the wound begins to heal. It is like going through a dark tunnel. Occasionally we glimpse a bit of light up ahead, then we lose sight of it awhile, and then see it again, and one day we merge into the light. We are able to laugh, to care, to live. The wound is healed so to speak. The stitches are taken out, and we are whole again.
But not quite. The scar is still there, and the scar tissue, too. As the years go by, we manage. There are things to do, people to care for, and tasks that call for full attention. But the pain is still there, not far below the surface. We see a face that looks familiar, hear a voice that has echoes, see a photograph in someone's album, see a landscape that once we saw together, and it as though the knife were in the wound again.
But not so painfully, and mixed with joy, too. Because remembering a happy time is not all sorrow; it brings back happiness with it. As a matter of fact, we even seek such moments in bittersweet remembrance. We have our religious memories and our memorial days, and our visits to the cemetery. And though these bring back the pain, they bring back memories of joy as well.
How long will the pains last? All the rest of your life. But the thing to remember is that not only the pain will last, but the blessed memories as well. Tears are the proof of life. The more love, the more tears. If this were true, then how could we ever ask that the pain cease altogether? For then the memory of love would go with it. The pain of grief is the price we pay for love.
(Author unknown)
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A Bereaved Parents Wish List
I wish my child hadn’t died. I wish I had him back.
I wish you wouldn’t be afraid to speak my child’s name. My child lived and was very important to me. I need to hear that he was important to you also.
If I cry and get emotional when you talk about my child, I wish you knew that it isn’t because you have hurt me. My child’s death is the cause of my tears. You have talked about my child and you have allowed me to share my grief. I thank you for both.
Being a bereaved parent is not contagious, so I wish you wouldn’t shy away from me. I need you more now then ever before. I need diversions, so I do want to hear about you; but I also want you to hear about me. I might be sad and I might cry, but I wish you would let me talk about my child, my favorite topic of the day.
I know that you think of and pray for me often. I also know that my child’s death pains you too. I wish you would let me know those things through a phone call, a card or note, or a really big hug.
I wish you wouldn’t expect my grief to be over in 6 months. These first months are traumatic for me, but I wish you could understand that my grief will never be over. I will suffer the death of my child until the day I die.
I am working very hard on my recovery, but I wish you would understand that I will never fully recover. I will always miss my child, and I will always grieve that he is dead.
I wish you wouldn’t expect me "not to think about it" or to "be happy". Neither will happen for a very long time; so don’t frustrate yourself or me.
I don’t want to have a "pity party"; but I do wish you would let me grieve. I must hurt before I can begin to try and heal.
I wish you understood how my life has been shattered. I know it is miserable for you to be around me when I’m feeling miserable. Please be as patient with me as I am with you When I say "I’m doing okay" – I wish you could understand that I don’t "feel" okay – and that I struggle daily.
Please excuse me if I seem rude – it is certainly not my intent. Sometimes the world around me goes too fast and I need to get off. When I walk away, I wish you would let me find a quiet place to spend time alone.
I wish you understood that grief changes people. When my child died, a big part of me died with him. I am not the same person I was before my child died, and I will never be that person again.
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Precious child
In my dreams, you are alive and well
Precious child, precious child
In my mind, I see you clear as a bell
Precious child, precious child
In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart, there is hope
'Cause you are with me still
In my heart, you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
In my plans, I was the first to leave
Precious child, precious child
But in this world, I was left here to grieve
Precious child, my precious child
In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart there is hope
And you are with me still
In my heart you live on
Always there, never gone
Precious child, you left too soon,
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
God knows I want to hold you,
See you, touch you
And maybe there's a heaven
And someday I will again
Please know you are not forgotten until then
In my heart you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
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Tears
TEARS
I cry a lot of tears these days, my Son
I cannot count the tears
My love for you has no bounds
It will last though all my years.
To dream of you, to hear your name
Or even out of the blue
The Tears they come to comfort me
'Cuz I know they come from you
The Tears that dribble down my face
In little hits and misses
Comfort me because I know
They are your warm, wet kisses
Telling me that you're at peace
In the Freedom that you sought
These warm, wet kisses on my face
Only asking me to suffer not
And as these days tumble by
Without you by my side
These warm, wet kisses that you give
Will continue like the tide
For I cannot stop them
Nor would I even try
I've always loved the ocean
And now Son, I know why
As the ocean's blood is salty
So are these warm, wet kisses
From a Mother's only son
A son she sorely misses
But go on, soar, my son
Soar to greater heights
I will handle the days
If you'll help me through the nights
Bring your warm, wet kisses
Your Mom needs them so
She needs to feel your touch
So she can let you go. |
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